For Better, For Worse: Is This Relationship ‘The One’ You’ve Been Waiting For?

Chispa Magazine-RelationshipsWhen it comes to relationships, it’s widely accepted that you have to take the rough with the smooth. It’s fine to go through ups and downs, but settling in a relationship that has more downs that ups is never a good idea. It can be difficult to know when you’ve found the right person, especially if you’re worried that the lightning bolt is never going to strike, but there are some signs out there that you may be heading in the right direction. Here’s a guide to help you decide whether this relationship is the one you’ve been waiting for.

You’re relaxed. Are you a self-confessed goofball when you’re around your closest friends? Are you lively and outgoing? Do you feel relaxed when you’re with your family? If you’re with the right partner, you should feel calm and confident in their presence, and you should behave in a way you would with your best friends and your closest relatives around you. If you can’t relax, you’re worried about what your partner thinks about what you look like or what you say, or your behavior changes, it’s time to rethink your relationship. Perhaps you’re worried that your other half won’t love the ‘real you’ as much as the persona you give off or you think there are things about you they wish they could change. Either way, it’s so much healthier to be with somebody who enables you to be yourself. If you can clown around, sing at the top of your voice and not give the fact that you haven’t got a scrap of makeup on your face a second thought, this is a good sign.

You’ve overcome obstacles together. The path of true love may be littered with hurdles and bumps, but this is part and parcel of life. If you can encounter problems, and deal with them as a team, this will stand you in good stead if you want to spend the rest of your lives together. If you feel like your partner goes missing when things get tough or you can’t rely on them to put a smile back on your face when you’ve had a bad day, perhaps your relationship isn’t as solid as you thought. If you’re going through a rough patch, reading articles like this one http://www.prevention.com/sex/therapist-tips-for-relationship-rough-patches may prove helpful. Hitting fences can set you back, cause arguments and take the shine off a relationship you thought was perfect, but it can also make you stronger. Research by Psychology Today suggests that trust is the single most important factor in a successful long-term relationship. If you can trust somebody to be there for you when you need them, you’re onto a good thing.

You have common goals. Does your partner flinch when you talk about weddings or having children? Do you squabble about how you spend money? Does one of you want to settle down while the other dreams of traveling the world or enjoying the party scene for a little longer? Common ground is important when it comes to conversation and sharing interests, but it’s also essential for planning a future together. It may not be the end of the world if your other half isn’t ready to log onto a site like http://diamondregistry.com and order a diamond engagement ring now, but how would you feel if they said they had no interest in marriage at all? If you’ve only just started dating, you don’t need to start thinking years down the line, but it’s always reassuring to know that you have similar goals, even if there’s a slight discrepancy when it comes to timing.

You’re happy. This may sound blindingly obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people settle for second best because they don’t want to be on their own or endure a painful or unfulfilling relationship because they don’t think they’d be able to do any better. If you’re happy with your partner, you love spending time together, and you’re looking forward to the years ahead, you can’t beat that feeling. If this isn’t the case, don’t stay in a toxic relationship or be with somebody for the sake of it. Be confident, be optimistic, and have faith that there is a perfect match out there for you.

Most of us set out on some kind of holy grail to find the one at a relatively young age. Sometimes, love finds us without too much of a struggle, but the pursuit of happiness is not always plain sailing. If you find it difficult to judge relationships or you’re not sure if you’re with the right person, hopefully, this guide will help you to reach the right conclusion.

Photo by Camila Cordeiro

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Mia Guerra

Mia Guerra

Executive Editor at Chispa Magazine
Executive Editor at Chispa Magazine, Mia Guerra is a writer at heart. Regardless the topic, she loves to investigate, encourage, and ruminate on topics that can make us better people. Aiming to live a Proverbs 31 life, Mia is ecstatic to be following her calling with Chispa. At home she is her husband's sidekick and together they are raising a God-fearing family in Atlanta.

Mia Guerra

Executive Editor at Chispa Magazine, Mia Guerra is a writer at heart. Regardless the topic, she loves to investigate, encourage, and ruminate on topics that can make us better people. Aiming to live a Proverbs 31 life, Mia is ecstatic to be following her calling with Chispa. At home she is her husband's sidekick and together they are raising a God-fearing family in Atlanta.